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Whether your last move was a cross-country adventure or a hop across the street, chances are it ended with a vow of “Never again!” But let’s face it, life has a funny way of making us eat our words. So, when you find yourself knee-deep in cardboard boxes and packing tape once more, don’t despair. We’ve got you covered with this comprehensive, humor-infused moving guide that will make your next move feel like a breeze. So, buckle up and let’s dive in!

The Two-Month Countdown:

Sort, Purge, and Conquer

Start by going through every nook and cranny of your house. Decide what sparks joy and what’s just collecting dust. Remember, every item you get rid of is one less thing to pack, move, and unpack. Consider if any items need special packing or extra insurance coverage. If you’re not sure, ask yourself, “Would I fight a bear for this?” If the answer is no, you probably don’t need extra insurance.

Research Movers

Don’t just pick the first moving company that pops up on Google. Do your homework. Get on-site estimates and make sure they’re in writing. Look for the USDOT number on the estimate. This isn’t some secret code; it simply means the company is registered with the U.S. Department of Transportation and adheres to its safety standards.

Create a Moving Binder


Your moving binder is your new best friend.

It’s the one place you’ll keep all your important moving documents, including estimates, receipts, and an inventory of all your belongings. This binder will be your bible throughout the moving process, so it’s important to treat it with respect.

Here are some tips for keeping your moving binder organized:
  • Use a binder with clear plastic sleeves so you can easily see your documents.
  • Label each sleeve with a clear and concise title.
  • Use a table of contents to keep track of all the documents in your binder.
  • Update your binder regularly as you receive new documents.

Your moving binder is a valuable tool that will help you stay organized and stress-free throughout the moving process. So take some time to set it up properly and you’ll be glad you did.

Organize School Records

If you have children, make sure to arrange for their school records to be transferred to their new school district. This is an important step in ensuring that their education is uninterrupted. It is also a good time to prepare them for the move by talking about what to expect in their new school and community. Let them know that they can have a say in how their new room is decorated, and that they can choose any color they want (within reason). This will help them feel more excited about the move and make them feel more at home in their new surroundings.

The Six-Week Sprint

Order Supplies

When you’re moving, it’s important to pack your belongings carefully to ensure that they arrive safely at your new home. This means ordering the right moving boxes, tape, Bubble Wrap, and permanent markers. You’ll also need to purchase specialty containers for your more delicate items, such as dish barrels for your fine china or wardrobe boxes for your designer clothes.

But don’t forget, your belongings are like your children. Each one deserves its own special box. So take the time to label each box carefully, so you know exactly what’s inside. This will make unpacking a breeze when you arrive at your new home.

Here are a few additional tips for packing your belongings:
  • Pack heavy items in the bottom of the box, and lighter items on top.
  • Label each box clearly with the contents and the room where it should be unpacked.
  • Use Bubble Wrap or packing paper to protect fragile items
  • if you’re moving a long distance, consider using a professional moving company.

By following these tips, you can ensure that your belongings arrive safely at your new home. And with a little extra care, you can even make the packing process a little bit fun.

Use It or Lose It

If you’re getting ready to move, it’s time to start using up all those things you’ve been hoarding. You know, the frozen foods that have been in the back of your freezer for years, the cleaning supplies that are past their expiration date, and the random odds and ends that you’ve never even opened.

Don’t just throw these things away! Instead, put them to good use. If you’re feeling adventurous, try creating “mystery meals” from whatever you find in your pantry. Or, if you’re looking for something a little more predictable, you could use up those frozen foods by making a big batch of soup or chili.

The possibilities are endless. Just get creative and have fun with it. And who knows, you might even discover a new favorite recipe along the way.

Here are some additional tips for using up your stuff before you move:
  • Have a clear-out party with your friends and family.
  • Donate your unwanted items to charity.
  • Sell your items online or at a garage sale.
  • Compost your food scraps.

By following these tips, you can declutter your home, save money, and help the environment. So what are you waiting for? Start using it or lose it!

Take Measurements

Moving to a new home is an exciting time, but it can also be a bit daunting. There are so many things to think about, from packing up your belongings to finding a new place to hang your hat. One important thing to keep in mind is the dimensions of your new home. Make sure to take measurements of all the rooms, so you know if your furniture will fit.

If your furniture is too big, you’ll have to either downsize or find a new place for it. This could mean selling your old furniture or donating it to charity. It could also mean buying new furniture that is specifically designed for smaller spaces.

On the other hand, if your furniture is too small, you’ll have a lot of empty space in your new home. This could make the rooms feel cold and uninviting. You may want to consider buying some new pieces of furniture that will fill up the space and make your home feel more cozy.

No matter what your situation is, it’s important to take measurements of your new home before you start moving in. This will help you avoid any unpleasant surprises and ensure that your furniture fits perfectly.

The One-Month Mark


Choose Your Mover and Confirm the Arrangements

By now, you should have chosen a moving company. Get written confirmation of your moving date, costs, and other details. This is also a good time to start thinking about how you’re going to bribe your friends to help you move. Pizza and beer usually work well.

Begin Packing

Start packing the things you use least often. Yes, this includes your waffle iron and croquet set. While packing, note items of special value that might require additional insurance from your moving company. Declare, in writing, any items valued over $100 per pound, such as a computer.


Label each box with its contents and the room it’s destined for. This will help you keep an inventory of your belongings. Pack and label “essentials” boxes of items you’ll need right away. This includes things like coffee, your coffee maker, and coffee cups. Did we mention coffee?

Separate Valuables

Add items like jewelry and important files to a safe box that you’ll personally transport to your new home. This is also a good place for your moving binder. You’ll need it for reference on moving day.

Do a Change of Address

Go to your local post office and fill out a change-of-address form, or do it online at usps.gov. But in case there are stragglers, it’s always wise to ask a close neighbor to look out for mail after you’ve moved. Check in with them two weeks after the move, and again two weeks after that.

Notify Important Parties

Alert the following of your move: banks, brokerage firms, your employer’s human resources department, magazine and newspapers you subscribe to, and credit card, insurance, and utility companies.

Forward Medical Records

Arrange for medical records to be sent to any new healthcare providers or obtain copies of them yourself.

The Two-Week Warning

Arrange to Be Off from Work on Moving Day

Notify your office that you plan to supervise the move and therefore need the day off. If they ask why, tell them you’re practicing your leadership skills.

Get a Tune-Up

Take your car to a garage, and ask the mechanic to consider what services might be needed if you’re moving to a new climate. If you’re moving from Florida to Alaska, you might need more than just a tune-up.

Clean Out Your Safe-Deposit Box

If you’ll be changing banks, remove the contents of your safe-deposit box and put them in the safe box that you’ll take with you on moving day.

Contact the Moving Company

Reconfirm the arrangements. This is also a good time to ask them if they prefer pepperoni or sausage on their pizza.

The One-Week Countdown

Refill Prescriptions

Stock up on prescriptions you’ll need during the next couple of weeks. This includes your regular medications, as well as anything you might need to deal with the stress of moving.

Pack Your Suitcases

Aim to finish your general packing a few days before your moving date. Then pack suitcases for everyone in the family with enough clothes to wear for a few days.

The Final Days

Defrost the Freezer

If your refrigerator is moving with you, make sure to empty, clean, and defrost it at least 24 hours before moving day.

Double-Check the Details

Reconfirm the moving company’s arrival time and other specifics. Make sure you have prepared exact, written directions to your new home for the staff. Include contact information, such as your cell phone number.

Plan for the Payment

If you haven’t already arranged to pay your mover with a credit card, get a money order, cashier’s check, or cash for payment and tip. If the staff has done a good job, 10 to 15 percent of the total fee is a good tip. If your move was especially difficult, you might tip each mover up to $100. Don’t forget that refreshments are always appreciated.



Make sure that the moving truck that shows up is from the company you hired. The USDOT number painted on its side should match the number on the estimate you were given. Scams are not unheard-of.

Take Inventory

Before the movers leave, sign the bill of lading/inventory list and keep a copy.

There you have it! With these tips, your next move will be so smooth, you’ll be saying “That’s it?” instead of “Never again!”


John is carrying his boxes into his new home.

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